spectacles

I used to have good eyes, this is a fact. In college, I didn't need glasses to get through any of my lectures, exams or papers. I used to see so clearly across the road, read bus signs from afar with my shades on without having to squint or wait for them to pass me by or for the barker to tell me where they were headed.

I never really realized how much I'd miss my clear eyesight until I finally broke it, a few months into employment. I remember that day I got my glasses; I spent the a good part of the day nauseated in bed. Recalibrating your eyesight does strange things to your system. (Looking back, that month in 2005 I broke my eyes and my heart. Coincidence?)

So the other day I set out early for a self-imposed bank day. The sun was high and I thought it was a good day to wear shades and really the day should have been crystal clear under that much sun and yet it wasn't because... because, well, my eyes are bad.

(I remember a friend telling me once about her bad eyes, about how she had to memorize what the color of people's dresses were so she could tell them apart on their prom night because hello, who wears glasses to prom night, right? Right.)

Anyway. It's just funny, how frightening it all is, when you can't trust your eyes. The world's hazy and you can't read signage and though you can tell it's a car that's coming, it's like you can't trust yourself enough to cross the street properly. It's these really small things, you know, that you never really pay attention to that much. I really should get out more and get more sun; apparently, it activates my brain.