2.17.2011

date a girl

I know what this looks like. Let me see -- you've been told so far to 1) date an illiterate girl (and also not to take that literally, if you're actually literate); 2) date a girl who reads (and to take this one literally); or to 3) go just date (regardless of reading preferences, etc).

--all of them fine suggestions, mind, but if you ask me, fuck all of it, just date someone you like.



So you're into sports -- maybe you should date a girl who'd willingly watch one of those college basketball games with you and hold your hand while your alma mater's being torn apart by her alma mater's college basketball team, or whatever. Or maybe a girl who'd wake up early with you to jog some place or a girl who'd stay up late to play basketball with you after work. The sort of girl who isn't afraid of sweat or body ache, or of looking ridiculous while cheering for the losing team.

Or, say you're into the arts. Maybe you should date a girl who won't think spending entire afternoons inside old museums is a waste of time; a girl who carries notebooks and crayons around, or a girl who'd draw you over lunch on a paper napkin. A girl who's not afraid to get dirty, to get paint on her clothes. A girl who's good with origami (because that could only mean she's good with her hands, and really, you should date a girl who's good with her hands.)

Or, maybe you're into music, so date a girl who makes nice mixtapes, or a girl who knows the Spice Girls, or whatever; better yet, just someone who's open to listening to a lot of things, a girl who'd introduce you to things you've never heard before or a girl you could introduce to your music and not end up judging you for liking Lady Gaga. (Because it's a completely normal thing to have the Vitamin String Quartet's version of "Bad Romance" as your message tone. Right?1)

Better yet, date a girl who makes music of her own. Date a girl who can sing because then a videoke date would be fantastic. Date a girl who can't sing but then isn't shy about this lack of talent, because then a videoke date would certainly be furiously entertaining.

And even better -- date a dancer. (Because trust me, next to a girl who's good with her hands, you should date a girl who could move fluently, and isn't it nice to use that word fluent in connection with movement? So sexy.)

If you're into TV, date a fangirl. Date a girl who likes Buffy. Date a girl who likes Veronica Mars. Date a girl who knows her way around the Internet insofar as her shows are concerned. Date a girl who knows what the word "portmanteau" means. Sure she's going to be a bit obsessive, but what sort of interesting girl isn't obsessive about something?

Date a girl who names her gadgets, because it's a cute quirk. Date a girl who likes animals because they usually have really soft hearts. Date a girl who likes cats because cats are evil little fabulous things that won't take crap from no one. Date a girl who likes dogs because dogs are awesome too.

Date a girl who loves her family, because that's where it all starts. Date a girl who adores her mom. Date a girl who thinks her dad's the sweetest man alive. Date a girl who thinks her sister's her partner in crime. Date a girl who's protective of her brother.

Date a panganay, because she knows how to take charge. Date a middle child because she has a lot to disprove about that syndrome you're thinking of. Date a bunso because they might want to try to have someone to look after. Date a girl who's an only child because they're always surprising. Date a girl who's lost her mom to cancer, or her dad to a war or her grandparents to old age, because she knows a thing or two about loss, and if you're lucky enough to get close enough maybe she'll let you in on a secret.

Date a girl who does chores, because that means you'll have someone to split them with when you start living together. Date a girl who knows how to use a screwdriver, or unclog a drain or change a lightbulb or do some emergency sewing. Trust me when I say sometimes, foresight isn't a bad idea at all.

Date a girl who's into the news, because you'll never run out of conversation topics. Date a girl who isn't, because you'll probably have more interesting things to talk about2 (LOL).

Date a girl you'd get along with, because it feels nice to have someone completing your thoughts before you get to the end of them. But then again, date a girl you could argue with too, because agreeing all the time's boring.

Date a girl who could roll with the punches because it's not about to be easy and you'll need someone who'll have your back when it has to come down to it.

Date a girl you can talk to. Date a girl you can be quiet with. Date a funny girl you can laugh and be silly with. Date a girl you can solve crises with over dinner. Date a girl who can cook. Date a girl who'd eat whatever you cook. Date a girl who's brave enough to try new food. Date a girl who won't mind that you have this ridiculous urge to eat at the same restaurant for so many times in a row until you've earned yourself some sort of allergy.

Date a girl who likes toy stores. This is almost non-negotiable.

Date a girl who'd write about you in thinly veiled metaphors. Date a girl whom you could only write about in thinly veiled metaphors, because apparently, the exact words don't exist. Date a girl who makes you want to write in the first place. Date a girl you can't stop writing about because you can't get her out of your mind.

Date a girl who drives you crazy3 - but in a good way.

Just -- date a girl. More importantly, date a passionate girl. Yeah, the passionate girl you've been eyeing since last year (She passed by my workstation one completely ordinary August afternoon). The girl you can't forget after all these months (Hey, I think I know you). The girl you have dreams about (Won't you read my hand? I heard you could). The girl you text first thing in the morning (Good morning, I have a good feeling about this day, and you?) and before you go to sleep at night (How was your day?).

Why? Because the passionate girl's worth the risk of having to walk down the road with your heart out in the open in your left hand4.

And because you're likely to surprise yourself. (You and I, we could be good together.)

I think for the surprise alone, it's all going to be worth it.




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1 For the record, my current ringtone is Imogen Heap's "Swoon." Haha sabay bawi!
2 Too true, oh my God. Haha.
3 But it is also important to note that, if you're a lesbian, date a girl who likes girls, for fuck's sake. And then date a girl who's single, because when you hurt somebody it's not nice. Play fair.
4 Better in Filipino, as some people would know.

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